Mysoginst or true?

Let me say to start off there are two valid sides to this argument.....

The argument is: Why are women responsible for the behavior of men? Now, to put this in it's place, why is it "what were you doing when you got raped"? Is that relevant?

Does it matter? Really? I mean, no matter what I was doing (barring wearing a sign that said RAPE ME), it is completely irrelevant to the fact that it was done. To think that I am somehow responsible for the acts of a criminal is wrong. I see this, I even agree that asking these questions target the victim as responsible for the criminal's behavior instead of simply saying "well whatever you were doing, it sure didn't warrant THAT". I even agree that this line of thinking is wrong to some extent....

To some extent...

At the same time, I also realize risky behaviors have consequences. I mean, if I stand in the middle of the highway, is the driver the ONLY one to blame for my getting hit?

The problem is, it's a thin, foggy, smudged, murky ass line. Most of us don't intend to blame the victim. But sometimes it kind of is your fault to some extent. No one says it's right, it doesn't suck..but at the same time it's a hard call to make.

Is it blaming the victim? Maybe, I guess it is to some extent....but at the same time, I'd also ask "what idiot stands in the middle of the road????" if someone gets hit. Let's draw the analogy out, because I'm not taking sides here, I'm trying to work through it. This is not my opinion, as of this moment, my opinion is forming, so if you flame me you're an asshole.

I guess if you're crossing the street then shit, that sucks. But at the same time, if you're standing in the middle of the road wearing black clothes at 3 am...it's not that you deserve it, but you can hardly be surprised at the result? It doesn't mean it's a good thing or a right thing, but it's hardly a shocker...

I guess I get that "well how were you dressed" is irrelevant to any case. I mean, that is definitely blaming the victim. Men go to nudie bars and don't rape women, so they just need to learn some control. I don't see a problem in agreeing that my clothing choices shouldn't be dictated because some man might feel urges. Some men might feel urges at hats...doesn't mean I quit wearing hats. I don't care if you're prancing down 5th Avenue buck naked, that doesn't relieve men of their obligation to control themselves.

But at the same time, I don't see the problem with protecting yourself via where you go and what you do. I don't see a problem with someone saying "that type of behavior could lead to rape". That doesn't make it your fault, but the fact is walking around Crime Central at 3 am even in a burka isn't exactly a good decision, neither is walking around there without a police escort. I don't see anything wrong with the warning. I don't see a problem with saying that "heavy drinking with unknown strangers could lead to rape" because at the same time I don't see a problem saying "walking around Port Arthur after dark could lead to you getting shot". Why not give yourself as much control over your fate as possible by making the dangerous areas or behaviors known? I really don't know if it's right to say that people can't say certain things because that "blames the victim". Sometimes it IS the victim...

If you stand in the middle of a police shootout and you know they are shooting...well it is kind of your fault you got shot. Or the highway analogy.

Look, I've been there and I wasn't doing risky behavior. I have a friend that was a good woman and at home alone not engaging in risky behavior. But I also have friends that didn't take their fate into their own hands: hung out at a bar and didn't watch their drink even though I know *I* told them not to leave it unattended. They didn't ask for it, they didn't deserve it, but they also didn't prevent it. We lock our doors, we watch the parking lot when we have to go out alone at night, we ask for identification before opening the door, we have alarms...in so many other areas of life we are warned to take our fate into our hands to the best of our ability and it's not our fault when things go wrong anyway. I'd think it would be irresponsible of us to NOT do the same when it comes to our bodies. It would be nice if no one had to say "that type of behavior is risky and can lead to x, y , and z", if we didn't have to lock our doors, etc.

I guess what I'm saying is I don't think a warning is blaming us for men's behavior. I do agree that society places too much responsibility on the victim for the criminal's acts in this case. But I don't think a warning is any more demanding than a warning to lock your front door to keep from being robbed.

Now you can flame.

I am a right wing utopian

Generally speaking, that doesn't even make sense. I mean, if you stick to the TRADITIONAL party behavior (and conveniently ignore that they switch around so much they make a cup and marble game look stable) one can not be a right winger AND a utopian. I mean, generally utopians are "let's all help and love one another" and that has been trad democrat. Which I suppose makes the supposed "insult" right on the head: I'm a centrist.

I believe anyone who isn't centrist isn't really American in their heart. *stokes the flames* Go ahead and turn purple and then you can read on to why I feel this way, you might admit I have a point.

While one may say "they just disagree on which way America should go"...I'd say the party lines are actually ANTI-American. What they disagree on is which side should force the other side to live their way. Really, that's their big fight. Which is the exact opposite of our entire Constitution that gives everyone the freedom to be themselves.

Not to mention, the complete split because of party bickering. The idea behind America was a bunch of intelligent people putting their personal beliefs to the side in order to make a country they could all live together in peacefully. So guess what, you can christian, wiccan, or satanist..it stays at the door behind you, because it's not about you..it's about ALL of us.

"My faith makes me who I am" If you can't seperate your faith from your job (as so many do) then get a new job. Admit your weakness and move out of line. Admit you can't rise above your own opinions in order to remember you're not the ONLY person in this country.

"We should help others". There is NO proven fact we should help others. That is a belief the same as "there is a god" is a belief. You may feel it is our moral obligation, but let's not forget that's YOUR OPINION and shouldn't have anything to do with how I live my life.

Can't we all just agree that THEY can't force me to be christian and YOU can't force me to pay for debts that aren't mine? Let's stick to some common infringements and you just make sure we don't stomp on each other on the way? I am not allowed to kill other people and they can't kill me..that's not religious or liberal. I think that we can all agree on some human rights...no one should be allowed to take the life a walking talking human person without some questioning. I believe in killing in self defense, but I don't mind if the police want to be sure it WAS actually self defense.

There are some issues that are far more murky than forcing us to become charitable or religious at virtual gunpoint. So why not just compromise? Why not, instead of saying (both sides) it must be MY way, why can't it simply be "what will allow us to fix the problem while maintaining as much freedom as possible". Because our entire Constitution was based upon the idea of NOT FORCING OTHERS. And I don't mean that bullshit broad brush "that's offensive and you're forcing me to listen cuz I'm trying to eat here"...that's an easy fix...see which customer the owner wants to lose. And if you're the customer, show a little fuckin' dignity and find a place that doesn't give you shit.

You are not you when you assume public office. To be honest, people who vote for Obama because "they like him" are stupid. We aren't and never should have been voting because we like them, we should vote because he upholds the freedoms we believe in and that we were granted through the loss of millions of lives over the course of two centuries. We should not lead by force or by talks, but by example. How can we ever show how wonderful a democratic republic is if we're so busy removing it from our own country. "We're bringing them freedom", but if we were showing them how valuable and wonderful it is, they could bring it themselves. Maybe with a little help...

I don't care about Obama. I didn't care about Bush at first. I don't have to fuck them or even have a beer with them..I care about what they were supposed to do. Bush failed miserably and I began to actively dislike the face he showed us and the face he gave America. Really, I don't hate Bush...I don't even know him. But you know...granted it's only been 5 months into his very first term...I'm not seeing much of a difference in how Obama and Bush are...they just have different agendas they want pushed...

And another pedo bites the dust

So yeah, I know, this a really unpopular opinion right now....and we all know how concerned I am with my popularity. But is there ANYONE else that's actually used logic and realized that we're probably down one pedophile in the world instead of hailing him as an American "icon"? Yes, I'm sorry, you don't just start being a pedo when someone accuses you, and Neverland preceded those accusations by MANY years.

And really, it's not like I just chose a side. I mean, I sat and thought this out years ago.

1. If the guy down the street with no children had opened a "private" theme park and invited ONLY your defenseless little boys over to play, are you really NOT going to think that's at least weird enough to choose "better safe than sorry"?

2. Are you aware that many men that have been accused of pedophilia AND PROVEN innocent still have their lives ruined by the accusation alone? But MJ's speshul cuz he made "Thriller".

3. The man had $20 million dollars to pay off in hush money AND one of the largest fan bases in the world, and what is the reason he believed that he couldn't ensure an accurate investigation?

4. The boys all looked amazingly similar, almost like...oh, I don't know..a profile....I mean, call me crazy but all MY friends don't look alike, yet all the men I have had sex with have shared many common traits. I'm just sayin'...

5. I really don't think a "deeply troubling childhood" excuses his behavior at all, any more than I think being famous does. I had a "deeply troubling childhood" and it doesn't excuse MY behavior.

6. The examination of his genitals came back with a conclusion of "highly accurate but inconclusive". Now, if it was a simple matter of "well the description is a very accurate one of ANYONE's penis" one would have thought that that would be what was said. Highly accurate is more than what I'd expect if the kid would have walked in on him in the bathroom. Acoording to police records there were some very incrimating matches found...Of course, the police were stymied when they tried to get his medical records and found that ALL OF THEM HAD BEEN RECENTLY REMOVED.

7. Why the need for a confidentiality agreement for "whatever went on while on Neverland Ranch" if it was all sweet and innocent? Guess what happens in Neverland stays in Neverland, huh?

8. Micheal's lawyer, who is well known for secretly taping conversations, did NOT tape the conversation with the little boy.....but I'm sure there's a completely innocent explanation for that....

9. I find it interesting how the things said on the Barbara Walters interview he and Lisa Marie did that he said a lot of things that the police and district attorney verified as inaccurate, and we're talking about the serious questions such as him being cleared and the photos of nude boys he claimed were not found in his home.

I could go on and on..but hell, "I'm a 35 year old man and like it when little boys sleep in my bed" would have me out the door of Neverland before anyone got their coats off.

The fact of the matter is, it points to guilty as hell. I personally think those that defended him are too star struck to get the facts and SEE the guilt. But for me it's easy, if this was ANY other grown man, what would I think? I would think he would be one who got shot for even looking at my kids. So tossing "but it's MICHEAL JACKSON" in there doesn't sway me.

I think he's guilty as guilty can get, I think the parents of these kids who would think "it's Micheal Jackson!!!" are also guilty as well. I think all of them belong in prison on the same charges. So, it's really offensive to be told how "he's an American Icon" by people who are all too star struck to separate his fame from the facts. And because of all that, everything he's ever done is invalidated. He's not an AMERICAN icon..if he's what represents us, we're in deep shit indeed.

Drunk salvation

So I go to Wal-Mart a few weeks ago....I hate Wal-mart, I really do. But I had to have tylenol for the baby and what else is open at midnight? So while I was there I grabbed up a few other things, gatorade, crackers, etc. I made sure to keep it below 20 and slid into the 20 items or less checkout, grateful one was still open.

Now on the through the parking lot I noticed a shit ton of cops. I mean, like they all had a meeting or something. The cashier is a woman I've spoken with frequently and jokingly I asked "What'd y'all do? Install a donut shop where the McDonald's use to be?" She asked "why?" and I commented on all the cops outside. Now, note I am actually the second in line, as she was currently checking out a six pack of Michelob. I didn't look at the person in front of me, except to note that a person was there. The folks in the 20 items or less are transient. I doubt life long bonds form from those meetings even occasionally. If we weren't in a hurry, we'd not be in the 20 items or less line...

However, this person declares "Y'know why thar thar?" Now, note I do speak redneck, as I grew up one, as you've all surely noticed my frequent use of "y'all" and "ain't". I turn my attention to see this man listing in front of me, eyes glazed, and see an opportunity for entertainment. Please folks, think twice..don't ignore my error...

"And why is that?" "Thar thar to make thar peace with God." Immediately, I stifled a moan and felt regret. I also pictured either a holy descension or a shoot out. Generally "making peace" suggests a last minute regret that spans the course of your life, where you realize you're about to die and realize that all those things you were going to make up for? Yeah, that time has passed.

I settled for an "Uh-huh" and scooted forward as it was my turn and he was done. He stepped back and said "Have you? Will you be duhlivered from Satan?" Yes, DUHlivered, I'm not making this shit up. In my defense, I was tired. "I don't believe in Satan". "Well you beeve in God right?" Yes, beeve..if you hadn't noticed, he was drunk. "If I don't believe in satan, one would find it hard to believe I'd buy God." "Young lady, you need to hear the word of God." At which point I realize, not only am I embarking upon a debate about god with a "christian", and not only am I doing so with a DRUNK "christian", but I'm fixing to be testified to and offered salavation from a drunk "christian" and it was my own damn fault. I looked desperately to see if she was done, and she must have saw a pleading look in my eye as she said "Hey, this is my job, it's not professional for me to discuss." Way to copout.....to give her credit though, she moved faster.

To forestall further conversation I hoped to surprise him into stupidity, "Have you read Darwin's theory on religious fanatisism and the irony inherent in the christian belief system?" Please also note, in order to stupify, they must be able to basically understand what you're saying, even if you are talking out of your ass. It only worked on the cashier. I paid her quickly and edged past the man with "I'm a Pagan". That worked. By the time he collected his wits I was to the metal thingy-ma-jig and by the time he made it that far I was in the crosswalk.

While the meeting itself may not normally be blog worthy, it brings to mind all kinds of things. It's like Jimmy Stewart duhlivering a sermon against adultery while in the throws of his own ejaculation with his prostitute. Really?

It's no shock to me that many christians frequently sin while telling you YOU are the one going to hell. However, it's rare to encounter who actually does it WHILE in the act of sinning. Not to mention with NO consideration of others. Really? You're going to give me shit about not believing in god and I know you're drunk and fixing to drive home. (Yes, I DID stop the security and tell them if they didn't want sued perhaps it was a good idea to go do something about the drunk standing in the middle of the parking lot looking for me..I don't need god to make me do something responsible). Not to mention, is god really worried about MY salvation? I mean, you may be 10 minutes away from killing yourself or others....I would hope he has at least ONE thing bigger than me on his mind. Like the fact that maybe you are fixing to commit murder and/or suicide. And don't give me that shit about god's mind being infinite and being able to encompass many concerns. If you want to go there, perhaps he could do something about those starving children and dying mothers on the other side of the world.

Which brings me to another question: If he can't intervene on behalf of all those other evils that abound in the world....why the fuck would he intervene for my salvation, and half ass it with a drunk no less?

Supreme Court disappointing

We've all heard about the Arizona girl who was strip searched over a single accusation of possessing Ibuprofen..you know, that dangerous drug that's been known to.....umm...ummm.....well you know, it's dangerous.

While she partially won her case in that the actions taken were wrong, noone's going to be punished for it. Because we know we all should reserve the right for school officials to strip our children at will. It's not like schools sometimes house sicko perverts...right? Right?

If I were this girl's parents the question wouldn't be "could I sue them"..the question would be "under which criminal charges can I charge them". That is, if there was anything left to sue after I beat the ever loving shit out of them. In my eyes, this is sexual abuse.

The Supreme Court's decision is disappointing in that the official receives no punishment. However, in all honesty I can't hold them solely responsible. The parents went the wrong route. The sexual humiliation of your child you want....money? No...you want jail time, honey. Who sues a fuckin' pedophile??? And while the principal may not be a pedophile...maybe...the idea is that his misuse of his authority permitted the sexual abuse of your child....that's jail time. I don't understand why he can walk, what was daddy doing? Maybe it's uncivilized of me, but a beating does leave a lasting impression. Ok, so *I* believe in a beat down, but really, what kind of parents want MONEY??????

Does anyone know if they tried criminal charges and maybe that route didn't work? I mean, then I could understand the money route..I mean the guy needs to suffer SOMEHOW....but only if they tried criminal charges first and those didn't work out. Although, it seems to me it'd be a landmark case. I mean, this isn't the first child to get strip searched by school officials. There was that gal who had to raise her dress during prom to make sure she wasn't wearing a thong (and didn't the teacher feel her up a little too?). Some kids were strip searched in a private school for $42. Hey, I got an idea! How about we waterboard the kids until they 'fess up!!??

So why didn't the school call the police and the parents...oh wait, she wasn't accused of a CRIME. So a strip search is justified how? The word of another 13 year old girl. ONE. That's it. No history of trouble, excellent GPA....and for what? Heroin? Crack? A gun? No, ibuprofen, that horribly dangerous substance you can't get unless you.....walk into a pharmacy with $10.

“My thought process,” Justice Souter said, “is I would rather have the kid embarrassed by a strip search, if we can’t find anything short of that, than to have some other kids dead because the stuff is distributed at lunchtime and things go awry.

Embarassed?? Embarassed??? Do you have any idea of the mental and emotional trauma related to this? Thanks for the next pedophile defense when they take naked pictures of children. I appreciate that. "Oh, the naked pictures don't HURT them, just embarass them a little..teehee". But hey, as long as they're school officials, they don't NEED a defense. They just have to pay a student $20 for a verbal accusation and they can ogle to their heart's content. Don't worry, you won't get in trouble.

One has to wonder how the result would have turned out had the girl gone to child services and said "my daddy strip searches me everyday".

I am stuck

So here I am, kids are quiet, nothing going on and I remember i have a truly awesome story in the works. So I open up my word processor, I open the file and.....nothing. Where the fuck was I going with this?

I've read over it several times, it's brought me to tears (believe it or not, I write well)...no ding. I've read it out loud, I've bugged my husband 200 miles away (please say I told you the gist of this)...no ding.

I even know the basic idea where I was going. I mean, I was going to a certain end...but what happened to the rest of it? I know I had a truly raging idea going because I remember jumping up from the couch and hauling ass over to my computer and typing madly for 3 hours....


It's good..I know it's good....shouldn't it be good enough to take somewhere? Even if it wasn't where I was going to start with?

My conclusion: don't go to sleep.

An analogy

Here's a thought:

Sears is giving away a box of free stuff today (not really, just read). You run up excited. You hear Sears has good stuff, this is a great chance to see what they have without blowing money you really can't spare. Or maybe you've never heard of Sears, but you're looking for a new store to buy toosl from. You finally find the box back by the stock room underneath a pile of broken down boxes. It's free, that's ok. You run home with it and open it. As you open the box, prepared to feast your eyes on an item that is supposedly quality, your nose twitches and your eyes tear up and then you peer down into the box. Did they...? Yes they did, they gave you a box of shit. On top you see a note. Holding your nose you lean in to read it and it says:

Don't complain, it was free.

If it's not a game, why are you playing?

I've been quiet. We're going to move to Houston soon, and it's a lot of work packing all these people to move.

But in between cleaning and packing and chasing kids I sit down to relax and long on to SL. My second life is far quieter than my first and chatting with my friends is a nice way to chill until my back stops hurting or while I'm having lunch, or quite frankly like today when I was just too tired to get up and do shit. We spend that time doing something together, our new thing is hunts. We comb the grid in search of new shops and solving puzzles. Done correctly we have fun.

Of course, the majority have to do it incorrectly. I've been banned, boohoo, from one sim. Quite frankly, I didn't want to go to start with, but my friends did and so we did. Her stuff is quite substandard and well, I don't DO substandard.

And this will probably get me banned from a whole ton of places, and well, I don't care. The discussion arose on whether or not SL is a game. It does fairly often, and you have your sides on this. I really don't care. It's fun, so I'm not picking a side really. Except when business owners in SL start crap on "this is my JOB!!!" First of all, if you are making money playing World of Warcraft, that doesn't change the fact that it IS, in fact, a game. But most importantly, if it's really THAT serious to you, then why are you treating it like a game?

I have never in my life seen more shoddy business practices than in SL. Like the gal who got her feelings hurt by a customer and so threw the biggest hissy fit, even down to chasing her down on her blog to make it very plain that she wasn't affected REALLY. Even though she dropped out of the hunt and was in tears for just HOURS. And if you want to ban me honey, go ahead, I haven't even been back to your store for the freebies since that stunt.

I love the ones in hunts who make it very clear what's really more important. Foiling the cheaters at the expense of the customers? Really? Because you seem to put more effort into that than in showcasing your product, and most likely I'm going to trash it, unseen, because you're more concerned with cheaters ONLY looking for freebies than you are me, who would have gladly bought those six GORGEOUS things from you until I saw where your priorties as a business owner really are. Not with me, the future customer, but so you can best people who most likely won't ever return? Sorry, I got the landmark and deleted your gift. How do I know if I wasn't cheating? Well to be honest I wasn't. Since the little flowers began coming out and I found one and clicked it to see what it was about, I've been running tests. Solve the clue and then see if you are one of those more concerned with your customers or with getting the best of someone else.

My favorite though, my absolute fave, is the gal who closes her shop at least once a year for 4 or 5 months at a time. She always says when she'll be back, but sometimes she's not back for months after that. Wow, contempt for your customers much? For those of you not clued in, a designer makes her own stuff. So creativity can run short. I get that...but because you aren't "inspired" doesn't mean you shut it all down. The really pathetic part is how many fangirls stand around waiting and being treated like that so they can have "IT". The funny thing is that there's only so many designs out there and well, I can probably get the same thing, cheaper, and better made. But don't worry, I never come to your store either.

If it's not a game, if it's your job, then quit playing and show some professionalism. Most of you couldn't run a business if someone stood over your shoulder giving step by step directions in 2 syllable words. You aren't really "running" one now. You're playing around...badly. You're nothing special. You're failures for the most part, who found a medium that doesn't care. Oh not all designers. Some never had the opportunity, some had a hidden talent..but the majority, you just suck.

"I'm a designer, I have feelings!!" Sweetie, I'm a writer and y'know, that doesn't make a damn when those critiques come in. Don't tell me I don't know what it's like to put my soul in something and have someone say mean things about my work. I'm not even going to say it doesn't hurt my feelings, it does. But I don't throw a hissy and chase them down to prove that they haven't gotten the best of me. I ignore the idiots and try harder for those who at least were constructive. You've put yourself in the position for criticism...grow a skin and get used to it. We aren't here to coddle you. Do your thing or cry, but don't expect me to cater to your feelings.

And for the customer, if you won't accept this kind of behavior from Sears or Red Lobster, why are you letting them do it to you here? There are tons of good creators out there that appreciate YOU and show it, frequently. Cilia'angel? Awesome person, awesome customer service. House of Ruins..awesome eyes, awesome customer service. Caly, Pazazz, Pididdle, Katatonik, Whimsy, Rockberry, Lemania (I don't always like her stuff, but you cannot fault her for her customer service or her work), Stringer Mausoleum, Ema's, Evie's Closet, House of Zen, Nikki Ree, Ova Hauled..I could make a long list. I'm sure you have your own list. They show they care about the customer, we make their business and they know that. They don't give out free stuff necessarily, but they still care and appreciate us. That's where you need to focus. Reward those who remember it's a business and don't act like they are doing US a favor. WE pay them...they aren't paying us. Of course none of these people are going to put up with bullshit, but if you approach them as an adult, they've always responded to me as one.

Being Different

I was reading about some idiot school that wouldn't let the kids paint Easter eggs because 2 of the kids were allergic to eggs. I wonder how they got along until Easter, because I know eggs were a staple of my school breakfasts.

1. If you don't want to draw attention to your kid, don't make them the center of the fun ruining. If you ruin the fun for everyone because you and your kid can't manage his differences, that makes the other little kids hate him for those differences. Where normally many probably wouldn't notice if he did things a little different himself, they will definitely know of the little kid who was responsible for them losing out. And believe me, they will find out.

2. If you are too incompetent to manage your differences, kill yourself. Don't bug me, just go away. Look I HAVE allergies. I'm allergic to pork, grass, pine, cats, the list can go on and on. I have asthma. I have managed my asthma for 17 years and my allergies all my life without bugging anyone else. I don't stop anyone from doing anything. I don't make it a point to put others out to accommodate my special needs. I handle all this myself. Cuz I'm a big girl. This is while not being able to take asthma medication because I'm allergic to it too. It's called responsibility. Get over it. We are not here to suit you. For every "special need" we are FORCED to accommodate, it's one more "special need" we resent. I have never seen less sympathy for the handicapped, asthmatics, etc than I have in the last 5 years. Even I'm losing my patience with them and I'm one of them. If you're so sick that walking outside can kill you, I'd suggest you stay in the house. I do it every summer while you people manicure your lawns to death, so you don't get any sympathy from me. I grew up with kids with allergies. They worked with parents and teachers to manage their differences and I've never seen a child have a reaction or an attack in school. Of course, teachers and parents weren't as lazy then as they are now, and that may have something to do with it.

3. What is the thing here? Either you don't want your kid to "appear" different or you want thier differences highlighted. "We're going to draw attention to our kid's differences by forcing everyone to do the same thing so they won't notice his differences". Again they WILL find out. There was a doctor, 2 ambulance men, 2 nurses, and 2 parents trying to keep it a secret that a girl got a coke bottle stuck up her hoohaw...the whole school knew about it the next day. She wasn't even entered into the records as what actually happened. She was entered in as appendicitis or something. We still found out. I think kids can manage to find out which retard's parents are causing trouble. And yes, one of my children does have allergies, to red dyes in certain drinks. Before we homeschooled, we managed, even in kindergarten. Her teacher wasn't lazy either.

If you don't want people hated for being different, then don't use their differences to cause trouble. Embrace the difference. You are unique. So what if you're body responds differently to certain things. Fine. Quit making such a big production of it and stay the fuck away from it. If peanut DUST will kill your kid, then maybe you need to take them out of school. YOUR problem, NOT mine or my kids or other people's kids.

The Age of Stupidity

Originally I was pissed about a new development in my game, where all the puritans have won the right to put some shorts over the Statue of David's penis. Realize that's an analogy, not exactly the truth. What it basically comes down to is "I don't want to see it and I have successfully made things change in a massive inconvenience to suit me". GO SL!!!

So I was off to rant on the whole puritan movement in my game, right up until I thought of the world today. Then I was pissed about the puritan movement in my world, until I thought a bit longer and realized that there is no age of science any longer, we have entered the age of fanaticism. It's not about puritans or even religion, it's about throwing yourself whole heartedly into a belief of any kind, without using any sense whatsoever. Intelligence is faked. Big words and an understanding of quantum physics does not make you smart. Just means you can memorize shit.

Take the smoking issue (and I swear to fuckin' god I will lose it if someone makes this all about smoking, you know you are Anon the Coward). There's this believe system that NOTHING good comes from smoking, yet it does good things. Parkinson's, Alzheimer's, focuses thought, a natural thing to turn to for those in psychiatric care. Don't get caught up in the smoking point, understand that there is NOTHING in this world that is all bad. NOTHING. Yet people have thrown themselves into this crusade without thinking about it and making that connection. Just a blind fanaticism. No thought behind it whatsoever. Then you go into the blind acceptance, no serious thought. A commercial or politician or something tosses out some tidbit and they latch onto it like rabid dogs and parrot it about. They don't read up on it and get the full story. Hell, just think about it. Arsenic, belladonna, bleach..all poisonous, yet they also do good things. It's hard to believe ONE thing has bucked the system.

Then there's the whole chastity ring thing going. What's that all about? I'd have more respect if someone had sex and then did the chastity thing, because they tried it out and said "hey, I don't need this right now". Yet instead, without investigating their options, these idiots have crawled all over this. No thought, no investigation, no anything. Just someone said "hey, do this" and a bunch of sheep said "ok". Just like that. No reading up on it, no nothing, just "ok".

And of course, you can't ever mention fanaticism without religion. I don't have to explain that one, do I?

I understand fads, but have you noticed all the new fads require a cultish devotion to something? I'm so fuckin' sick of Relay for Life. Yet if I point out that the majority of the money these people donate ends up in some jetsetter's pocket as well as politics and I refuse to contribute, I'M the asshole. So sorry for my investigations, maybe I'm not quite the fanatic you are. I like some thought with my coffee.

Are we regressing, or have we become that selfish? Is it just too hard to think anymore? It's hard to tell. Perhaps this has always been a part of humanity and I'm the outsider for not being a nutjob?

It seems to me a matter of selfishness. Oh don't get confused, I do hear their little justifications. "I don't want other people to get poisoned", "I only want to save your soul", "don't you want to cure cancer for the world". But y'know what I've found, in the end, it's always about THEM. "Your poisoning MY air", "I've decided God is the right one, so you must do as I do", "I lost my mom to cancer and I want a cure there when I get it". So it would seem that the new religion is "ME!ME!ME!" And really, since when do we look into the reasons for our own behavior? Are they all afraid to face the fact that what someone else wants may not be the supreme evil they want to paint it? Or maybe if they paint it as the ultimate evil, they don't see the damage they do? It's easy to close your eyes to what good there is to something when you're so bent on getting your way. So just don't admit there IS good. Sex is painted as some horrible evil (regression much), yet sex does so much good physically (and I don't mean just how it feels, but how it affecs the human mind and body) that I'm surprised doctors dont' prescribe it. Did you know that sex is actually good for certain back problems? That sex releases natural hormones that improve the mind in various ways? Hell, look at how happy some folks are who get it good! LOL

The point is, we seem to have re-entered the age before the age of reason. No one wants to read the science, no one wants to hear the truth, no one cares about you really. Just DO it, this way on this day at this hour in exactly this fashion. Your inconvenience, your feelings, YOU do not matter. If they really cared, they'd ask you what YOU wanted, they wouldn't tell you what they want.

Then again you could make a really good case for apparently the whole world no longer wants to use their brains. Isn't it easier when you have a preacher telling you how to behave and what to do and what to say? Life is always easier if someone else makes all the decisions and holds all the responsiblity. Then you can always get out of trouble with "I'm just following orders". Is the new religon "Blank brain"? Your preacher/politican/mechanic engineer tells you what all the bibles/scientific papers say and you just don't have to bother your pretty little head about it. Forget the fact that teen pregnancy and sexual diseases have been shown to soar when abstinence is the message. YOU don't want them having sex, so you just shake some papers on national television and lie about the conclusions.

I don't think that bothers me near as much though as the fact that it works does.

You vill do as ve say

Wow. Why did we kick Germany's ass? Apparently we weren't mad at Hitler, we were made because we hadn't thought of it first!

Alabama Plans to Tax Fat Employees to Recoup Insurance Costs

If you read the article you get nice blurbs that are actually quite scary.

But there's a way to avoid the fee: Get a check-up at an in-office "wellness center," where nurses will check for diabetes and hypertension and measure blood pressure, cholesterol, glucose levels and Body Mass Index (BMI).

Let's take this apart. Apparently we are all yogis able to control the tiniest of bodily reactions. If you have high blood pressure, screw stress and every OTHER way to get it, screw that it may have absolutely NOTHING to do with a bad habit you don't have. You WILL bring it down, or you will be "punished" for it. Diabetic? You're that way because your fat, because we all know diabetes isn't genetic. How stupid are you? You'll be charged for it. BMI? Fuck that scientific bullshit that BMI is completely useless for the majority of people, meet it or pay. Can't lose weight, too fucking bad. Got a thyroid problem? Too fucking bad. YOU WILL DO IT OR WE WILL TAKE MONEY OUT OF YOUR PAYCHECK.

So it's $25 now. Sure, but would you feel the same way if it was you being charged for having a low white cell count? Why aren't they charging extra to folks with cancer? If I can control my glucose levels enough to bring them down because you say so, then shouldn't YOU be able to mentally squeegee the cancer out? You're just lazy and want folks to feel sorry for you, stupid cancer patient. We all know you can get rid of it. It's just that easy.

And hey, if you think you're weight is YOUR business, fuck you. You're a comany man. You're life is NOT your own. WTF were YOU thinking? No, when you signed up for a job, you signed up for life management baby. Your ass belongs to them and you're fucking retarded for thinking otherwise. Just because you don't get paid 24 hours doesn't mean that time is YOURS.

Charge women more because they can have babies, increasing risk of death and permanent medical issues. Put sky divers, horse back riders, people into sports on that list too. Sexually promiscous folks. Why don't YOU tell us all how many people you've fucked and if you used protection? If fat people get public weigh ins, then we get to know what a slut you are.

What I want is what happen to freedom? Freedom isn't real if you're being punished for it, no matter if it's fifty cents or $50,000. We can talk shit all day about you paying my "health" bills, but it doesn't matter when you even decide to stick your nose in MY food.

BTW, smokers told you it'd be the fat people next.

Politesse dear, always

Y'know, sometimes, ok, all the time, the sheer impoliteness of people drives me nuts. I mean, I know coming from Queen Asshole that's funny, but I may be an asshole but I'm a polite asshole. The thing is, my assholishness (yes I made it up) is just honesty that pisses folks off. So I'll tell you there's birdshit on your head, but unless you're making fun of someone's hat, I'll take you to the side to do it.

So I'm in this email group with other moms of gifted kids. One mom is, well, stuck up is the word I'd use. Her 14 year old spends his free time playing video games and wants to be a game designer when he grows up. I feel sorry for the kid, because his mother obviously believes that since SHE thinks so low of games then he should have higher aspirations and "quit wasting his time". Apparently she missed all the after school movies that show that parents like that drive their children away.

So anyhow, she writes in how this is what he does in his free time and how to make him stop because video games are immature and she knows of some adults who play and goes on to imply that adults who game are emotionally deficient and how worthless her son is going to be for making this his career. I do take offense at the attitude, but not her, I mean, how is she supposed to know I'm a gamer? So I sent in my two cents....it took me 2 hours, but I was pretty confident that I had come off as "you seem kind of misinformed, I'd like to show you the other side of it". I told her I was a gamer, I explained the intricacies, the studies. I promise, every line I wrote was combed over and over in order to inform and not sound rude. It may seem like a waste of time, but all I could think of was this poor kid being raised by a woman that tells him his dreams are worthless, which to a kid could imply that he's worthless for having such worthless dreams.

Now, I expected, as we're a polite group, maybe not agreement, but maybe a tone down of the immature, worthless gamER attitude. I mean, as much of a bitch as I am, *I* would have toned it down. Hell no, she writes this passive aggressive email back about how this is her opinion and reiterates over and over and over again how worthless and useless and he needs to stop. I mean, says it to the point where I know two things: 1. she's not interested in the other side, 2. this is a personal attack. So I write another email, changing tactics and focusing on the need to not let her personal opinion influence her treatment of her son and deriding his dreams. A sure fire way of installing a wall between them. Which was a lot nicer than the other response from another mom: "I feel sorry for your son for having you for a mother."

Which rates yet another PA email in which she relentlessly pursues the worthlessness and immaturity of someone who plays games. I quit at this point. Not because I don't want to give the poor kid a break, but hey, there's only so much you can do from email with a jackass and engaging in the "you're a cunt" fight accomplishes absolutely nothing for the boy. And quite frankly, here's my elitism showing, but she's obviously not sophisticated enough to engage in a conversation on a topic without letting her personal opinion permeate every inch of it. I mean, she won't get the larger point of "you're causing you and your child issues" because all she cares about is the topic itself "gamers are idiots".

How stupid can you be? I mean, look, I have a lot of opinions and many are set in stone. Not because I'm closed minded, but because I've thought long and hard about each of them. If anything directly proves them wrong, I'll change them, but as things stand, through much consideration, they are my opinions and I'm very vehement about them. However, your opinion on a subject cannot override the greater issues, especially if it's someone you profess to love.

This is a story I shared with her: I find sports fucking useless. I think players are overpaid and it's pretty sad to get paid so much for running around with a ball while there are men and women who work harder or contribute more to society that barely scrape by. I could go on and on in very derogatory terms that would make my opinion on sports crystal clear and make people who watch them feel like I personally think that person is useless for watching them.

One problem here: *I* dont' see the point. That doesn't mean that there isn't one. That damn sure doesn't mean that people I care about or know are useless over one thing *I* don't get. My husband LOVES sports, he's a jock through and through. To let my personal opinion override the big picture would cause our marriage issues. I know my husband isn't worthless. I know my friends are not immature and worthless. To define them over my personal opinion would be stupid. I'm very careful to keep my opinion out of his day to day ball games. The only time it comes up is if we're trying to find new ground, which has happened once. LOL

My husband feels the exact same way about my gaming. He thinks it's worthless and stupid. He also does not deride it, though I'm sure he wants to sometimes. We give each other shit sometimes, in joking. "ah, look, he's playing with the ballie again, another million!" or him: "Ooooo double experience weekend?" *orgasm sounds follow*. It's all in fun and we each try to make time for the other to engage in their chosen activity. He frequently heads out with his buddy to watch UFC pay per view fights at a bar, I try to leave him alone during important games. I get to play for a few hours while he takes over child care. For one, while he is a jock and I'm a gamer, these only define us to some extent, it isn't who we ARE. These things don't invalidate why we love one another. To let these opinions override who that person is, it would ruin our marriage. To be honest, no matter how much I don't like sports, I still love that part of him.

You can't let your opinion on something ruin something with someone you love. There are times when you have to set that to the side because to not do so would drive you apart. You wanna drive a wall between you and your kid, do it because he beats up old ladies or does drugs, don't do it over fuckin' video games.

This was a rant on politeness that turned into a rant over stupidity, but hey, you've read this enough, can you honestly say you didn't see the turn coming?

Gor: or you asked for it

"Gor" refers to the lifestyle some people have committed themselves to based on these books by John Norman. Go see Wikipedia, I haven't read them. I might, I have some friends who like this type of living, but I personally am not into anything that gives me a "master".

The basics, man is Man/Master, woman is slave, freewoman (not enslaved), or panther (won't happen except by force). Please understand I'm getting my info from Second Life, NOT from the books. Now, slave is slave. Easy to get, you want to please anyone free, particularly your master. Freewoman is a woman living by gor rules not enslaved, but if she acts in any fashion outside the rules, she becomes slave. By doing a slave activity, she can be enslaved. She has to be covered all the time. Panther is refusing to live by man's rules and lives outside the Gor society. Basic gist, it gets far more complicated than that.

What we are discussing is the slave aspect. Don't picture the panther, being brought in a kennel (yes you heard me) against her will kicking and snarling. No no, we have women who VOLUNTEER to be slaves. I've asked them why and there's this long discussion of "wanting desperately to please a man", of women already being slaves to men, or women not being slaves not living their full womanly potential. I'm picturing fundie women on crack here. None of this resonates with me, I don't get it. But hey, if you like it, more power to you. I have gor friends, masters/slaves/freewomen/panthers. If they like it, no issues. This isn't about Gors, there are some lovely wonderful people who RP or live gorean.

My problem lies with the fundie haters. Most of which are women who had a "bad experience" with Gor. I get it, something like this is frought with those who wish to take advantage of it. Men who overdo it. Yet, you VOLUNTEERED. Are you really stupid enough to think that men who choose this type of "life" are all decently wonderous men who only look to love a woman? I mean, it's OWNERSHIP, SLAVE is the operative word here. What the fuck did you think would happen? The men would give you cookies? If you go into something ASKING to be treated like an animal, how can you expect there won't be some with a distorted view of what animals should be treated like?

Yeah yeah, I've heard it. "You don't understand, it's a mental hold they get over you. They manipulate your emotions and blah blah blah". This is the same shit I have heard from abused women except one key part. Abused women don't hear a man hits them and say "oooo I want some of THAT". No no, the beatings are a SURPRISE. These women don't volunteer for the abusive husband.

These gor chicks ask for it. It's not like you can be enslaved at the grocery store. Now, get this, there's more. This isn't REAL LIFE, this is SECOND LIFE. In other words, you can teleport away and log out and bye bye gor lifestyle. Most of these men? Long distance. You might be from Maine and your "master" from France. In other words, he can't come get you. You don't even have to permanently log out on that character. You can do all the neat computer things that put him on ignore and he can't do anything to you you don't allow. He can grief you, but that's what landowners and Mentors are for. This isn't something that happens against your will, you have to approve of every thing he tries to do to your avatar. And don't give me that mental "he trapped me" shit. YOU have issues if you let a guy ONLINE control you and fuck up your self image. YOU need therapy. I'm not saying he doesn't, but this isn't about him.

So don't be surprised if the next time I say "gor" and you react negatively I tell you to get over it. YOU ASKED FOR IT, literally. I am completely unsympathetic to your bad experiences. You ASKED for it. You are the idiot who jumped in there, and I don't want to hear a damn thing about "he hurt me". Good, what the fuck did you expect? This isn't a set up for men worshipping women, this is women worshipping and being enslaved by men. That's what you volunteered for.

"Well, he said he'd respect me". Well, when I was in high school the guy I gave my virginity to said he loved me. Both of us were stupid, move on. The fact is, you cannot claim the abuse the married woman claimed. You ASKED for it. You said, "you're my master. I am yours to command as you see fit." How can you be surprised when he sees fit to mistreat you? An abused wife isn't looking for a master, she's looking for a husband. She can claim abuse. All you can claim is stupidity.

So, I don't care about your bad experience. I don't care about how he "abused" you. I don't care that you were looking for a nice master and picked the wrong one. I was looking for a good husband and have a divorce under my belt. Hardly a call for abuse, just picked the wrong one (the first time). If you want to cross me off your list because I have friends who live Gor and I don't tell them what to do or cut them off, good. Most likely you've been crossed off for being stupid, so we're even. Go take your sob story to some one who gives a shit.

New drain covers; aka I'm still not watching my kid

Go look then come back and listen.

1. You notice who got affected? "7-year-old granddaughter of former U.S. Secretary of State James Baker" Ok, if you have suffered a tragedy, you shouldn't be allowed to speak for a law until you've passed the grieving. These people are dangerous to fundamental freedoms. They are either manipulators or poor grieving family members USED by manipulators. Either way, they shouldn't be allowed to speak for something until they are thinking reasonably again. Or at least thinking. I've lost someone very close to me. I can assure you that my decision making process was definitely impaired.

2. This happened in a hot tub, not a swimming pool. Believe it or not, there is a difference.

3. Notice there was no lobby for WATCHING YOUR KIDS. Ok, mean me to pick on the family, getting past that, you have to admit that perhaps if you don't allow children in swimming pools alone (or shouldn't), then a hot tub would definitely be out? Or does that make too much sense? I'm not positive, but I think hot tubs are supposed to be unhealthy for little kids anyhow. Why on earth would anyone think it's ok to leave ANY kid out in a container full of water alone anyhow? Even local pools have lifeguards. If kids had good judgement they wouldn't need parents.

Why is the answer to make a federal law telling us what kind of drain techniques we must use and NOT for parents to watch their kids? I understand, you can't watch your kids constantly. I get how even the best parent has something happen. The other day my 2goingon3 got a bottle of Tums. However, *I* didn't go bitching about Tums' not so child safe lid. (He's fine btw)*I* was beating myself up for not keeping a better eye on him. It's not Tums' job to keep these things away from my kids, it's mine. Tums did it's job when it put "Keep out of reach of children" on it. Granted I did put it up, but hey, kids grow and I know that. I should have done a better job. There is a limit to how much we can demand everyone else take the responsibility we are supposed to have. (BTW, Poison Control Center RAWKS)

We should not expect others to change their lives for our children. They are OUR children. WE agreed to change our lives, others did not. To demand that everyone behave as if a child could drop out of the sky any second and your house must be childproofed on that off chance, is going beyond what we have a right to demand. To make a federal law requiring ALL pool owners do something, whether children are allowed around it or not, is just micromanaging. It's a step into shit government needs to stay out of.

*fires off the second shot*

You know, it's hilarous how the "season of peace" has spawned a war...

Let's bring in dear Senator Buttars...poor Buttars doesn't have enough to do with his day. Apparently ignorant of the war in Iraq, our new incoming president, AND the economic crisis, he got bored. He wants Utah legislature to declare it's opposition to the war on Christmas.

Obviously he's also ignorant of the First Amendment and history.

"It would encourage the use of 'Merry Christmas,'" Buttars said of the non-binding statement that is still being drafted. "I'm sick of the Christmas wars -- we're a Christian nation and ought to use the word."

Yeah, I'm sick of the "Christmas Wars" that the christians make up every single year too.

I don't know what's sadder, that it took a reporter and a lawyer to bring up the violation of the First Amendment or at how many Senators were asleep through history class. Maybe they didn't even bother to show up.

I get it, it's a resolution. It's really nothing more than a statement that "we support Merry Christmas". But it's also a statement that says "we don't recognize the Jews, Blacks, and others of our nation". You're putting Christmas ahead of Kwanzaa, Hannukkah, Yule, and those that actually do celebrate Festivus, and secular Christmas celebrators. So what, our beliefs are all secondary to yours? Once again a christian (and I mean that in the loosest possible terms) has made it abundantly clear that they will force us to face them whether we want to or not. Why? Why must you be in our faces constantly? The only problem with this thinking is that if we are forced to face you, then we have to do something about you.

This is also a government attempt to back a religion. Christians claim Christmas every year when they start this war on Christmas shit. If you're backing a religious holiday, then you're backing a religion. If you are backing Christmas to the exclusion of Kwanzaa, Hannukah, and Yule, you've tossed your hat in the Christian ring. Resolution or not, it's one that will be followed with lawsuits.

Don't even get me started on interfering with the free market and the irony of regulating businesses to say Merry Christmas while many christians condemn the same businesses for "commercializing" it.

This is getting beyond stupid. I read about a guy who was at a store and bought something and paid with his credit card. As the cashier held the credit card back to him she said, "Merry Christmas!" He says, "You too." She wouldn't relinquish her hold on the card and repeated "Merry Christmas." She thought she didn't hear him and said, "You too" again. She continued this behavior until he realized she wouldn't let go until he said "Merry Christmas" all the while glaring. He finally said it and was allowed to leave. I'd have said "oh you're not a christian either?" and reported her ass.

But the point comes to: Why are you such selfish little bastards? There's like a half dozen holidays in December and yours is ONE day. Diwali (I have no idea what that is), Kwanzaa, Christmas, Hannukah, Yule, and believe it or not, some folks DO celebrate Festivus. Hell, Hannukah lasts longer AND predated Christmas. Yule predated it too, in fact, they stuck Christmas in our Yule!

Also, Jesus actually celebrated Hannukah, you Christians are refusing to recognize the day that Jesus himself recognized! That can't bode well....

Sorry, got a little distracted.

Go victimized a christian, say "Happy Holidays" everwhere you go.

I've been tagged

Well, it seems my friend, SWFreedomLover, has tagged me. This seems like a very sneaky way of finding out what I'm reading since I'm THE book connoisseur of the web. ;) EVERYONE, who's ANYONE, wants to know what I'm reading.

RULE ONE, I have to grab one of the books closest to me, go to page 56, type the fifth line and the next two to five lines that follow.

RULE TWO, I have to pick five people who love books and who could receive the Bookworm award with honor. (note: I’m picking five people and assuming four of them love books, one I’m sure does…..LOL)

So here goes:

"Nonetheless, each floor has its own invisible peculiarities, lurking in wait for dancers' feet. Even the floor of Toronto's famous Drummond Theatre. The company had gone through two complete rehearsals, undress and dress, without a hitch; it was in the final onstage warm-up class, a scant hour before curtain, that John DeMarco, who had been dreaming of and working toward this night for all of his professional life, found the flaw with his name on it. It broke his ankle."

Starmind, Spider and Jeanne Robinson, Ace Books, 1995

The problem with five people is I don't know 5 other people who aren't already referenced, I only know 3. So I'm breaking a rule, but still tagging those I can.

My 3 are: Ron Britton, Watcher, and Sophisticat. All are very well read fellows.

Don't worry, new post in the works as well, sometime in the next couple of days. The War on Christmas has begun!!! I take my place in the front lines!!!!

Black Friday (How stupid are you?)

I don't want to know which of my friends participated in Black Friday. I really don't. I don't want to know how many of you chose to participate in an event that grows more and more out of control every year. L, I would like to note this is not a response to YOUR post, but a response to the many others who have decried ANY responsibility on the part of the shoppers.

I know it's "IN" now to blame those nasty corporations. It's all their fault for everything. I'm not a real corporate friend myself. There's much they do wrong and Black Friday COULD be handled better. However, in our rush to blame everyone else, let's not forget to lay this directly where it belongs: on you. Every single one of you that participates in Black Friday, ie going to the store and waiting in line, have contributed to this man's death. I get a good deal, I know how it is, especially when you're poor. However, many of you participating are not. I know some folks that have plenty of money and buy things not only they don't need (I mean, they did not WANT these items until they saw the deal and do not use them), but also don't have them in mind as gifts. Really, what is the point in buy 6 of an item you know you will not use and don't know if anyone you know will use? Just because it's cheap? Really? You do realize that the $200 you just spent will now sit in your closet until it's obsolete? Gape like a fish, but you know it's true. Well, maybe not, some of you will not consider your friends on their birthdays in order to get rid of this stupid thing and justify your shopping. You will then tell yourself next year, "Well, I got rid of them all, everyone loved them!" Maybe, and maybe they are better friends than you are. Since you all chose to queue at the doors of stores like animals, you have told the corporation yet again, "do with us as you will".

But let's get back to the real point here. Are we adults or are we not? Are we the decisionmakers in life, or are we sheep steered hither and yon for the corporate cash box? Are WE in charge of ourselves, or are we nothing more than ignorant masses here to feed the corporation? I say this in all superiority because I STAYED HOME!! I shopped some awesome deals online at midnight Thanksgiving night and was in bed by 1 am secure that my shopping for the entire Christmas season was over. I was in my pajamas, at home, cigarette in hand, getting free shipping. I know, not everyone can do this sort of thing, but if you can and you didn't, then you are a problem.

*coughs* Sorry for the gloatfest, but I do so love shoving your stupidity in your face and grinding it in. It's orgasmic. Anyhow, the fact is, we are in charge of ourselves and our behavior. While certain blogs (which will remain linkless) will decry the corporations as it's the responsabilité du joure, let's not rule out free will. We all know the madness of Black Friday, provided you didn't crawl out from under a rock buried in the center of the Earth yesterday. We are all aware of what our needs and wants are. It's not that I wouldn't LIKE to participate. We aren't broke, but a good deal sure helps out. It's just that I don't let what I want overpower my decency. My decency says we do not contribute to the madness. My decency says as I could do just as well elsewhere and lessen one person contributing to the standard mob mentality that we allow to run our nation. Black Friday is not the disease, it's a symptom of us, the human disease.

Ah, that's not the right analogy, as we're not a cancer, mindlessly reproducing, ignorant of our effects...we just don't CARE. Look at the AP article.

Other workers were trampled as they tried to rescue the man, and customers stepped over him and became irate when officials said the store was closing because of the death, police and witnesses said.

Shoppers stepped over the man on the ground and streamed into the store.

"When they were saying they had to leave, that an employee got killed, people were yelling 'I've been on line since yesterday morning,'" she said. "They kept shopping."

How is Walmart responsible for THIS? How is any company responsible for the people who chose to continue shopping and whine because a man had the gall to die when they trampled over him in a rush to get to their "deal"? I get why not stop and help him, you surge forward or get trampled yourself, but to whine because the store is closing after you helped kill a man???? You want to blame the corporations for our "fellow man" (not mine) being so crass and having no decency? The corporations didn't foster this behavior. Something is seriously wrong with these people. If I hurt someone I will stop and try to help and suffer over what part I may have played. I DO NOT CONTINUE SHOPPING! You have decided a plasma tv is worth more than this person's life.

Look, it's bad enough to show up and later say, "I never expected this" after watching this shit on the news every fuckin' year. We'll just stamp "Retarded" on your head and put you on the special bus. But to then WHINE and continue shopping? You are a criminal. Not only have you possibly contributed to a wrongful act, but you have NO remorse. You're no better than a serial killer. I'm not exaggerating, you really are no better. If you want to blame the stores, the fundamental problem is not Black Friday, but YOU. You are trying to remove the blame that SHOULD cling heavily to your own shoulders. It doesn't matter that the corporations COULD find a safer way or better way to do this. This does not remove the responsibility for your actions and your behavior from yourself.

Are we human beings, theoretically capable of rational thought, or are we nothing but animals throwing feces? I can tell you what you damn well look like...

The True Dangers of Internet Porn

Wow. I'm not a big porn fan (hehe, I said big). While I'm a fairly lenient parent in letting my children view sex on tv provided it's in a context that they observe natural behavior in life, I do not subject my children to blatant sex for sex/entertianment's sake. We do not watch shows when there is no rational reason to throw a graphic sex scene in the middle other than to pull in the male viewer or titti-late. ;) While the Matrix 3 was not bad, I to this day do not see the purpose of tossing in Neo and Trinity's sex scene throughout the tribal scene. I do get the sexuality in the tribal dancing. One seemed sex for sex sake, the other was making a point of the culture. I can't explain it too well, but I get it.

So understand, I have a healthy view of sexuality in that I understand it's a fact of life and I'm no frigid virgin scared of a little willie (I know, I gotta stop that). I refuse to raise my children with that view myself. Now, going a bit further, if you're new to this blog, I'm a HUGE fan of personal responsibility. I tend to put a lot of people's behavior on their own shoulders. One should act, not react. If you choose to be reactionary, then you are choosing to give up responsibility of your behavior to your emotions.

Knowing all this, you can probably understand a few of the problems I may have with the above website. (Yes, I'm well aware it's selling a product, however, if you think this is the first time I've seen Vagina Madness, you're blind) If you click on the title you get taken to the Reefer Madness of Porn. I say this because this:

The price our young people pay is more often than not, addiction. The sexual images our teens view release chemicals in the brain (endorphins), our body eventually craves these feel good chemicals like alcohol or drugs--- serious problem though, the alcoholic can avoid the bars and situations… how do you avoid the images that pop into your head when you’re trying to study? When you see a new face at a party? You don’t, that’s why Internet Porn has been compared to crack cocaine– but worse!


sounds suspiciously like this:

At the heart of the campaign are two studies on the neurochemical effects of THC, marijuana's effective ingredient, published recently in Science magazine. The putative results: Marijuana is not only a "gateway" drug to heroin, but addictive in its own right. Just like alcohol and cocaine, marijuana is capable of "hijacking the brain's so-called reward system," Science reported, and priming it for future addiction.

Really? Seeing a penis is a "gateway" drug to donkey shows? Please say your fucking with me..please?

Internet porn is not a romance novel. It is not a sex education for beginners. In its simplest form it teaches a complete lack of intimacy—using another human being to masturbate oneself, and most often degrading the other.

Wow, and who would imagine that after thousands of years of some version of porn (do you really think there were no voyeurs in Ancient Rome? wrong) that the sudden slight convenience of internet porn verses mailed/cornerstore porn is going to ruin the view of intimacy, ESPECIALLY if the parents display a healthy view of intimacy? Now I'm not trying to be an ass, but if your kid is that stupid, the problem isn't porn. We have survived the advances of porn for thousands of years and, because of the internet, we are suddenly brainless monkies?

When viewing porn on the internet starts becoming an addiction, the viewer becomes obsessed with making/stealing time for this activity. He/she will turn down healthy invitations to social activities, preferring time with the computer, will find excuses to be home alone or locked in their room, etc.

Because no young boy discovers masturbation unless someone points it out to them, and they'd hardly disappear to the bathroom when they did find it. C'mon guys, admit it, for the first little while you did it a lot. I'm not giving you shit, but be honest.

Don Juan, move over—there is a new role model for young good looking guys—the predator! There is a generation of young men who think that sex is a game. They are the hunter and any girl is the hunted, the concept of relationship does not even cross their mind. They emulate the role models they see on porn sites, and strive to be like them.

And where the hell are you dad? While it's apparent that every generation would far prefer to lay the blame on something else, let's get down to brass tacks: Your fault. Now, it could be because we as parents do not get a handbook. We're flying by the seat of our pants here. However, at least admit you've made mistakes. We all have, nothing to be ashamed of. It could also be the example set by dear old dad. Dear old dad who divorced mom after 20 years because that hot thing on his arm is younger and prettier. Don't worry dad, mom does it too. You and your friends teach these boys where to get their ideas. Predators are glamorized as "playas" on tv yeah, but where the hell were you, from when he was a little boy? You obviously weren't teaching him proper respect for a woman. And the worse you treat women, well, the more he gets the idea that they aren't meant to be treated respectfully. Studies still show that the biggest influence on a child is his or her parents. So guess who's falling down on the job? The buck stops here, you are the weakest link, pick a phrase, but get it.

If you read "understanding your critical role" you see a ton of good ideas. I can't argue with any of these really. I suppose I could question just what exactly they mean by "protect" as it's constantly misused as "don't even let them know it exists", but I'll give them the benefit of the doubt.

I can't argue with "things you should know". Those ARE things you should know...if you're doing your job.

In the "6 Signs Your Kid Could Be At Risk" I have a problem with. At risk of what? A disturbing scene? Have you seen the NON-porn things these kids have sent to each other? What exactly is the risk here? Getting an idea? Knowing young men, they probably have already heard it from a friend and decided to accept/discard it. I'm really not sure what the risk is.

1. The family computer is conveniently placed in the basement, attic, back room
2. Your child has a computer with internet access in their room
3. Your child has their own laptop with internet access
4. You have not set parental controls on the computers that your children have access to
5. You never check the history on you’re computers browser
6. Your teen creates/finds situations to be home alone and on the computer

In other words, shadow your child constantly. Don't get me wrong, I'm a big fan of supervision, but you have to learn at some point to start trusting your kid a little. If nothing else (especially if you're one of those constantly harping on what the "right" way to raise a child is), trust the method you used. Just as those who seek to be enlightened must maintain a state of unconscious wakefulness, you must maintain a state of watchful trust, tailored to your child. Some children need more watching than others, but they all need to feel that you believe in them to make the right decisions. By setting parental controls and checking their history and not leaving them alone, you show that you don't believe they can handle responsibility. This being the same little brat you bought a 2 ton metal machine that goes in excess of 100 mph. Wow, schizo much? You'll trust him to not run over someone and speed around (though it's been proven that damn near every teenage boy does) and yet can't trust him to not go into a sexual frenzy over the site of a vagina? Please be aware, this says a lot more about you than it does him.

The younger your children are when you start your action plan the less resistance you will meet; the following are the basic House Rules for all ages at all times.

Wow, David Koresh's guide to brainwashing: the sooner you can get them under your thumb, the sooner you can laze back and let the threat manage things. I'm not saying don't teach them young, but this phrase suggests making them malleable to better able to control them. Just remember, when you have made them so and are in control, you've left the back door open to everyone else that would like them malleable and controllable. Also, a sign that you're too lazy to BE a parent. As long as you maintain control over them, you don't have to actually teach them a thing, huh? What gets me is you treat them like little children as long as possible and then SEND them off to college. When the dean calls for the 8th time about Johnny's alcohol stash and Jenny's been busted blowing the football team again, you're surprised! Really? And it's all porn's fault, not yours for treating them like they're 5 until the day they moved out. You gave a 6 year old a credit card and now you're pissed because he spent 10k on toys.

Look, I see what it is. You're lazy. It only takes a village to raise a child when mom and dad don't want to do it. You have relegated the responsibility of your child to everyone else. The schools teach them sex, political views, acceptable behavior. The church teaches them values. The internet, the tv, the books must all be modified to suit what you want them to learn. What the hell do you do? Not a fuckin' thing. What gets me is you are the same lazy asses who get mad at what the schools teach them. "I don't want my kid learning that liberal bullshit/redneck religion". Well, they gotta teach them SOMETHING, you're damn sure not doing it. Don't bitch if you don't like it. You bitch, and yet you STILL don't take responsibility. You don't change it, you expect everyone else to change.

The buck stops here. We are the ones who CHOSE the responsibility of OUR children. I don't want to raise your kids. Chances are, I don't LIKE your kids. I may feel that some of the "child free" are some stuck up bastards but there's one thing they have right: They didn't choose to have children, YOU raise them. I didn't choose to have more children so what the hell makes you think I want responsibility for yours? If you want a village raising your kids, put them in a state home. Look how well that whole village thing is going for THOSE kids.

Filling a hole

Now I want you to follow me here. This is NOT a religious thing. If you pay attention, you'll get it. If you don't pay attention, well, don't expect me to be surprised.

One of the things that drives me absolutely batshit in this world is desperation. Not the feeling, that doesn't get me. It's the things people do that drives me nuts. A woman's husband dies. They've been married for 40 or so years. We're talking committed. In the wake of her husband's death, while desperately grasping for something to fill the hole his loss has left in her life, she's become a fundie christian. (Stay with me) She's turned her back on her entire life in order to find a meaning. Now, this wouldn't bug me, aren't we all looking for some sort of meaning? That our time on earth isn't worthless. That we will leave a mark that says "I was here and I did something".

We all do this and it's ok. It's human. But in the wake of a loss of any kind, one must expect that desperately clawing for any meaning is no better than having no meaning. You commit your life to some ephermeral that, within a few years, you realize really means nothing to you. In return for this desperate race to fill that hole, you have burned bridges that you may never get back.

I say this isn't religious because in THIS case, she turned to religion. I've seen cases though where people have undergone complete personality changes to devote themselves to charity, a friendship, children. You say, how can that be bad? Well, 1. You get to this point when, most of the time, you realize that this isn't YOU. This isn't who you are. 2. You're trying to replace something that can't be replaced. The funny thing is that anyone with a modicum of intelligence (I know I just greatly shortened that list) will tell you that it's not healthy to replace someone. Yet no one bats an eye when you replace someone with god or charity or some socially approved behavior. Really, it's no different.

I hear all the things. Maybe this is what she needed to get through. If this gets her to sleep at night, leave her alone. I'm not interested in how much sleep she gets. I'm interested in her working through what she feels to make decisions for her life that won't hurt her later. When you come back from any type of rehab, they say to make no big decisions for a year or so. Do you know why? So you don't try to replace the drugs/alcohol/etc with a dependance on another person or with a new type of addiction. Why would any such thing be different if you lost a spouse? Why would you make a sudden decision that the religion you've mocked all your life is something you should jump into? That the charity you've turned your nose up at is suddenly worthy of your time? Why is it no one points out the painfully obvious? No matter what you fill that hole with, it will never take the place of the loss. Don't change your life significantly until you are no longer grieving. Don't run to religion, sports, people, charity. Socially approved behavior or not, that does not make it more healthy behavior. Yet I'm the asshole for pointing that out.

If you cared you wouldn't accept her "conversion" to god, but recognize it for what it is: A lost, lonely woman clutching desperately for something to give her life meaning in the wake of losing a, if not THE, central part of her life. Let her grieve, help her, be the rational one at a time that she needs someone else to be rational.

Homeschooling, unschooling and "Bad Parents"

There's this site called babble.com. Apparently they allow articles that go against the grain of standardized parenting. Some homeschoolers on there. Joanne Rudnall wrote an article on her first attempt at homeschooling. She has chosen to use an unschooling method. IMO, a perfect method at least to start with seeing as how her son is 5 years old. The article is fine, I'm sure we could find places to disagree were we to talk, but the article doesn't bother me. The comments, WOW. What a bunch of losers. What gets me is the hoops they jump through in their mind to justify their OMG reaction with.

1. The little boy gets the appropriate amount of sleep for a young child, he just stays up late. Why is it that everyone thinks that everyone else has to follow THEIR timetable? I'm sorry, I'm not a morning person. I get my energy and my drive after dark. Since we've started homeschooling the kids sleep as they wish. My older children are up at the butt crack of dawn, greeting the sun as it rises to the sky. Myself and my younger children come blearily stumbling through the house after daylight to find that my oldest children are eating breakfast and have already started on today's lessons. I would hardly find this abuse. Ok, so their lives aren't lived by bells and whistles, ordering them when to stay or go. They learn punctuality, as I'm a great believer in it. We have appointments just like any other family and those times are strictly adhered to. Just in the rest of our life, a clock doesn't run it.

2. She took him to a bar. OMGOMGOMG!!!!! Ok, not the bars YOU hang out in, but a family friendly pub type bar. She's English, as I understand it, that's normal. Where's the objection here? Is it the alcohol? If so, arrest any parent who's ever had a drink at home. I don't care if it's an upscale bar...it's not the dive we go to where there are fights every night, someone's always loudly sloshed, and the waitress has brained a guy twice with her tray because he can't keep his hands off her ass. He's not even getting alcohol, he's drinking cranberry juice. Get over it.

3. Why do people assume homeschoolers are some elite bunch with a ton of disposable money? I've never met or heard such a person. Sorry, but we make sacrifices to be able to stay home with our kids and teach them. We don't get Red Lobster every night, we don't drive a new car, we don't have a cool tv, our clothes are not in style (but they are comfortable). Every homeschool parent I know or have heard of barely make ends meet. We aren't taking advantage of a easy life, we are sacrificing for something we feel is more important.

4. A beer doesn't equal getting wasted. So if we get to have a beer or margarita at 2 pm at the playdate, that's no different than you coming home to your kids and having a martini in front of them. We don't assume YOU get roaring drunk, why do you assume we do?

5. The children were naked, playing in the mud. It seems if you're going to let kids play in the mud, nudity is the best option. Especially if you're riding a subway home. I get it, to you nudity means everyone is having sex. I'm sorry, not all of us tie sex to nudity. Some of us actually get naked for other reasons. I took my clothes off last week for a strange man, spread my legs wide open, and accepted his entry. He was my gynocologist. No sex involved...pervert. If you think those paper gowns mean anything except to make you feel better, you have issues. I mean really, they are up your cooch, is the paper gown really doing anything to keep him from seeing it? It's just there so you feel dignified.

6. She hasn't read the unschooling handbook. I find it amusingly strange that an unschooling parent has said that another unschooling parent is at fault because she didn't get information out of THE unschooling handbook. Waitwaitwait, you mean to tell me, the person who believes learning is best on hand and in the world (not from books) is telling another unschooler that she can unschool best if she gets it from...waitforit....a BOOK?????

7. He watched Juno. THAT'S NOT APPROPRIATE TV FOR A LITTLE BOY....Ok, YOU watch Disney every day. Who are you to say what's "appropriate" for a kid you haven't met? Ok, I get it, YOUR kid isn't smart enough to get it so other people's kids can't watch it. Why don't we tell all the kids who can read 4 grade levels ahead of their own that yes, I know you understand it and yes, the "baby" books are simple, but you are only 6 and so MUST only read the "baby" books. That's no different from telling an intelligent child he can only watch Sesame Street and Blue's Clues because it's for his "age group". You want to keep your kid limited, I suppose that's your business. MY kid however is going to be challenged at every opportunity. I think all the "oh so now your so cool because your kid can watch Juno" comments are jealousy because their kid can't UNDERSTAND Juno.

8. She's being arrogant? So are you, you are arrogant enough to think you know her whole life from an article. You are arrogant enough to think your method of raising children should override anyone else's. You're arrogant enough to think your rant should matter to anyone. She's ENGLISH. Different sense of humor, different way of talking, get over it.

9. Why do people think sending a child to school is the way to prepare a child for "real life"? I really don't know anyone who sits at a desk all day with only breaks for bathroom and lunch, calls his boss to get permission to use the bathroom, never talks to anyone, and listens to someone else lecture them for hours on end except for breaks on pre-made worksheets. No one, my husband doesn't know anyone either and he knows TONS of people. (My husband doesn't need a fave five, he needs a fave 60). We all know people who have to take responsibility for their own job, have meetings, take lunch and sometimes have lunch with a client, leave the office to go work on clients things, talk all day on the phone, and stop between clients to make sure their paperwork is filled out. They can take an hour off at any point in the day to go for a workout if they are stressed, accept phone calls from their wives (except during meeting times), and stop for a coke and a snack. If you're more working class (such as a roofer or welder) you definitely don't see a desk that day and you INTERACT (not merely in the presence of) with others. Oh wait, I DO know one guy who does that (except for listening to someone lecture him all day, he does do that part). He's a programmer and he has deplorable social skills. People consider him abnormal because he doens't talk to people much. Ok, so this situation is abnormal for adults, but acceptable for children because they are in the presence of 30 other kids they can't talk to? Wow, you're right, that's SO much better. Also, that whole segmented day thing, is your day segmented? I mean do you ONLY work on certain things at certain times of the day? What happens if something happens outside it's segment? Yes, I'm being deliberately obtuse, but really, you people SHOULD think about it.

Hell, you people should think, but I suppose that's entirely too much to ask.